Improving

Well, I think things are improving, maybe, a little, not sure, yes definitely!  :) :)

I’ve gotten back to regular exercise for starters.  Back to my old routine of getting up at 6.30 to do a 30 minute walk before I go to work.  And three Curves workouts a week.  It helped a great deal with our uphill hike last weekend!  Phewww!!

But most of all, one of my old, most hated, behavioural patterns has disappeared.  That’s not to say that things have completely changed in other areas, but this one particular behaviour was the epitomy of the loud persistent voice in my head.  So to not be acting it out anymore, to not have the voice so strong and domineering is a relief of amazing proportions. 

There is a little more peace in my head now.  Not to mention MORE ROOM for other wonderful things!  Like blogging, 52 Projects, photography…  All these other things that I love doing!

Now to continue growing from this point.

I’m in a better place now to focus on creating peaceful thoughts.  To write about it again and to consciously create it.  Before, my energy was completely spent trying unsuccessfully fight ‘the voice’. 

At one point this week, I heard that voice, weakened but still there.  And I got so fed up with it.  “I’m not fighting with you anymore.  I don’t care if you are there or not, I’m not fighting.  Do what you will”  And the voice disappeared.

Perhaps the fight is what kept it alive.  And it is acceptance that takes away its life force.  In the past, I think I have tried that before though, without success!  But for whatever reason, now it is working for me.  Whatever place I am in now, whatever growth I have done to get here, it is working now.  And I am grateful.

 

Walking the Path
A track from our bushwalking adventure last weekend.